Islam is a religion that makes things clear. It puts into practice what us as people ‘biologically’ already know what to do, but sometimes fall short of. It is a guide for us.

My reason for stating this is because I want to address the responsibilities of children towards their parents. I will focus on the difference between the non-Muslim and the Muslim world.

In today’s society, it’s beyond obvious how children treat their parents. You have TV shows like “Super Nanny,” where parents can’t handle how their children behave, so they ask others and go out of their homes, for extra help.

You have another show, called “World’s Strictest Parents” in this TV program parents push teenagers to live with “strict parents” for a week in the hopes that they’ll change.

It’s all in the media. You literally see this awful disrespect EVERYWHERE. What does this say about us as people? Where are we headed?

For one thing, you can blame the parents for allowing disrespect at an early age, often resulting in worst behavior as the children get older. You can also blame the parents for the abnormal (what is the ‘norm’, now) environments where they allow their kids to grow up. You can pretty much put the blame on a lot of things, and a lot of people. And while blame might be the easiest route, it’s not the smartest.

What society is lacking today has everything to do with the absence  of morals, decency, and Islam. Point blank.
Not every Muslim is perfect. Heck, not every human is perfect. Non of us is perfect but Islam is perfect. If we all were to practice the rules of Islam, we would be MUCH better off.

I’m not saying that every non-Muslim is disrespectful to their parents. That’s actually far from what I’m saying. What I’m saying is, the morality of the world has died. You see it on the TV and in movies all the time. If people followed the rules of Islam, they would live a new life.

Without further due, I now present to you, the responsibilities of children towards their parents according to Islam (all of these things are rooted in your biological thinking.)

Allah says in Surat Al-Israa verse 23: The Lord has decreed that you worship only Him, and be kind to your Parents.  If one or both of them is old, say not to them a word of contempt, and not to repel them, but a Muslim should address them in terms of honor.

As you can see, Allah puts a strong emphasis on how we should treat our parents. God makes it very clear how He wants us to treat our parents. He’s even taught us through our Last Messenger (PBUH).

Here are some Hadith of the Prophet (PBUH) :

The Holy Prophet (PBUH) said: “The pleasure of Allah lies in the pleasure of one’s parents and His wrath lies in their wrath.”

Abu Hurairah (May Allah SWT be pleased with him) reported: A person came to Messenger of Allah (PBUH) and asked, “Who among people is most deserving of my fine treatment?” He (PBUH) said, “Your mother”. He again asked, “Who next?” “Your mother”, the Prophet (PBUH) replied again. He asked, “Who next? ” He (the Prophet (PBUH)) said again, “Your mother.” He again asked, “Then who? ” Thereupon he (PBUH) said ” Then your father.”

We as people should realize the status of our Parents, and treat them the way they SHOULD be treated.
Children should not raise their voice towards their parents.
They shouldn’t hit or shove their parents.
They shouldn’t speak ill of their parents.
They shouldn’t disobey their parents.

Do you realize the struggles your parents went through not only to bring you into this world, but to keep you here, AND provide for themselves while raising you?!

We all need to heed to the advice of Prophet Muhammad, and listen to the command of Allah.
Inshaa Allah we’ll change, and we’ll get better.
Which will make our parents happy, and will ultimately make Allah happy.
‘Cause isn’t that why we’re here?

About the author

I'm Aaminah Abdul Khaliq, but most people just call me "Ami (ah me)" for short.
I'm 18, a student and I live in the U.S.A. I love writing and always have. I write because it's part of who I am, and it makes me feel accomplished!

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Allah Almighty says, “This day I have perfected for you your religion …” (Holy Quran 5: 3).

When we become parents we find ourselves in a confusion and torn between different parenting theories. Therefore it is important to look at all the do’s of don’ts of parenting that Islam describes.

Choosing good partners

An important aspect of parenting begins even before birth, i.e. choosing righteous and responsible partners. Islam forbids marrying non believers and discourages us from marrying sinful people. At one occasion Holy Prophet (PBUH) advised believers to choose a woman because of her religion. At another occasion He (PBUH) said,

Narrated Abu Huraira: The Prophet said, “The best Women are the riders of the camels and the righteous among the Women of Quraish. They are the kindest Women to their children in their childhood and the more careful Women of the property of their husbands.” (Sahih Bukhari)

 

Rituals and naming

Once born rituals of Adhan, circumcision (of boys), and aqeeqah should be followed. Similarly the Holy Prophet (PBUH) encouraged us to name children after prophets.

Rights of Children  

Allah has given children rights over parents just like He has given parents rights over children.  The Prophet (PBUH) said “… and your child has rights over you.” Sahih Muslim

Giving children their rights is the most important aspect of Islamic upbringing. Some are as follows.

Physical needs

Giving clothes, shelter, food and healthy activities like sports. Holy Prophet (PBUH) used to play with kids; chased them during play and raced with Hazrat Ayesha (Radi Allahu Anha). Moderate recreation and festivities are also favored.

Psychological need

First and foremost is love and attention. Holy Prophet (PBUH) kissed children and allowed them to sit in his lap.

“Narrated Abu Huraira: Allah’s Apostle kissed Al-Hasan bin Ali while Al-Aqra’ bin Habis At-Tamim was sitting beside him. Al-Aqra said, ”I have ten children and I have never kissed anyone of them,” Allah’s Apostle cast a look at him and said, ”Whoever is not merciful to others will not be treated mercifully.”(Sahih Bukhari)

Education and Training

Most important education is to let children learn Holy Quran and Sunnah. Especially Salah (Namaz) should be taught to them at a tender age.

Respect and Self esteem

It is a very important yet highly neglected right, and justice among siblings is also stressed at various occasions so as to protect children from resentment and hatred.

Protection

Children are an Amant from Allah. We are accountable for their well being in Akhirah. In today’s society sexual assault of minors has become a plague. It’s a huge responsibility of Parents to protect kids by all possible means be it by restricting servants and cousins, keeping tabs on company, raising awareness in family and building a culture where everyone is looking out for everyone.

Discipline

Islam strikes the right balance between reward and punishment. Just like pricking a sick child with needles and knives, discipline is the sour medicine for unruliness.

As a last resort and for disciplinary purpose only parents can beat children as long as they don’t hit on face and sensitive parts and don’t leave a bruise.

The concept of “spare the rod and spoil the child” was very sneered at in the western world up until now when western overindulgence is giving bitter fruits. Parents are allowed to scold their child for the purpose of discipline as advised by the Holy Prophet (PBUH). However parents cannot abuse this authority.

Hazrat Anas ibn Malik (Radi Allahu Anho) served the Holy Prophet (PBUH) for ten years when he was a boy he said. “Every work that I did was not according to the desire of my master, but He (PBUH) never said to me: Fie, nor did He (PBUH) say to me: Why did you do this? Or why did you not do this?” Holy Prophet (PBUH) himself had never beaten a child.

Holy Quran has taught many duas for off springs and many prophets made dua for their children like Hazrat Zakariya Alaih Salam. Also Holy Prophet (PBUH) forbade parents from cursing their children.

With so much rights ordained for our children by Holy Quran and Sunnah, we don’t have any room left to make an excuse with regards to their responsibility. Kids are in fact the greatest gift and blessing of Allah Almighty and we should thank Him for this precious treasure by following these guidelines.

 

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The young generation of today finds its life too personal and do not want anyone to interrupt in their life styles be it their parents or anyone else.

The holy Quran says:

‘’Treat your parents with great kindness; if either of them attain old age, do not even say ‘’uff’’ to them; nor rebuke them; but speak to them with kind words. Treat them with humanity and tenderness and pray, ‘’o our lord, be merciful to them; just as they brought me up with kindness and affection in my childhood.’’

(17: 23,24)

The above hadees clears what is the position of parents in Islam. Children of today have become independent on their own. They do not give the due respect to their parents and elderly family members. If their parents advice them about something, they think they are interrupting their privacy.

Islam has given a really high place to mother. Paradise is at the feet of mother. This can be proved through an incident. Once a man asked hazrat Muhammad (S.A.W) ‘’ to whom should I show most of the kindness? “ . Our beloved prophet said ‘’your mother, your mother, your mother and then your father.’’ A woman carries her child in her womb for nine months. She bears all the pain during the process of giving birth. She spends every minute of her life worrying for her child. She sleeps only when her child is asleep. This gives a very high position to a mother in Islam.

Once a man came to Hazrat Muhammad (s.a.w) and said that he can’t take part in pilgrimage as he has to take care of his old mother. Hazrat Muhammad (s.w.a) said ‘’You don’t have to worry. This act of yours will earn you more sawab than the pilgrimage’’

This doesn’t mean that fathers do not have an equal position as to mothers. If paradise is under the feet of mother, father has the key to enter that paradise. The position of father in Islam can be explained through this statement of Quran

                             “God’s pleasure is in the pleasure of the father, and God’s displeasure is in the displeasure of the father.”

Fathers are those beautiful persons who work day and night for the comfort of their children. They sacrifice their comfort in order to give their children whatever they want. A child can never ever repay all the favors that his father did for him so he must show his gratitude towards him by being obedient.

A child must always remember that his relationship with Allah almighty is directly linked with his attitude toward his parents.

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I am running a freelance company to provide development, designing, seo and writing services.

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"Can religion really lead a mother and father to kill their own child? It is clear that in the Ahmeds' case, this was so: Alesha, the victim's surviving sister, testified in court that her parents openly acknowledged that they must do away with the rebellious teenager. She had adopted 'western ways', and brought shame on their family."

Cristina Odone exploits the tragic death of Shafilea Ahmed in order to demonstrate that she's an ignorant bigot.

Daily Telegraph, 3 August 2012

Of course, Odone doesn't provide any evidence to back up her assertion that it was their religious beliefs that caused Shafilea's parents to murder her. The quote from Alesha Ahmed that she produces indicates that their motive was a warped conception of "honour", which is not specific to any faith community.

As a 2007 report prepared for the European Parliament, Honour Killing, its Causes and Consequences, states:

"Honour killing is often mistakenly believed to be an Islamic practice or a practice condoned by Islam since it often occurs in Muslim-majority societies. In actual fact honour killing is forbidden in Islam and there is no mention of this practice in the Qur'an or in the Hadiths. There is little evidence of the practice in Muslim-majority countries such as Indonesia or Malaysia. Honour killing occurs in strongly patriarchal societies often referred to as 'honour-based' and which are found primarily in the Middle East, the Balkans, the southern Mediterranean, and South Asia."

In the UK, ACPO's Honour Based Violence Strategy emphasises that honour-based violence is "a cultural, not a religious phenomenon" which "cuts across all cultures, nationalities, faith groups and communities". Last year a Sikh from Telford, Gurmeet Singh Ubhi, was convicted of killing his daughter, in a case that had obvious parallels with that of Shafilea Ahmed. Because the perpetrator wasn't a Muslim, however, this murder received far less attention from the national media, and we were spared stupid articles from the likes of Cristina Odone claiming that it was his religion that made him do it.

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